Proactive living

Posted on May 14, 2013 by angathome
Unfortunately none of us have a fairy Godmother who is going to come along and make everything change in the blink of an eye. We've got us and the Holy Spirit. Let's get moving!

Unfortunately none of us have a fairy Godmother who is going to come along and make everything change with a swish of her magic wand.

In the parenting courses that we run, we discuss a concept called proactive parenting, as compared to reactive parenting. Reactive parents do exactly that – react to situations as they arise and parent in the heat of the moment. Proactive parents have a plan to get where they want to go and actively take steps to get there.

Hosing her off outside, hanging upside down by the toe... tempting!
 When I found my  11 month old sitting next to the art cupboard covered in yellow paint from head to toe I had a choice. Yell, moan about how difficult raising children is, decide that she was the last child we were ever going to have, remove all paint from our house and ban art forever, take her out in the back yard, dangle her by the big toe and hose her off to teach her a lesson (that was tempting!) or I could accept responsibility for the disaster and plan a proactive method to ensure this situation was not repeated. I chose to tweak my flexible routine to ensure that she didn’t have unsupervised time to roam the house in the future.

In life, we all have the choice to live pro-actively or reactively – which way are you choosing?

When was the last time you sat down to honestly reflect on your life and evaluate what is going well and what needs work? Where are your sticky patches? Your areas of stress and difficulty? What are you trying to ignore, get around, push under the mat and otherwise refuse to deal with head on? What can you pat yourself on the back about and sit back to enjoy? What is getting up your nose and ruffling your feathers? What direction are you headed in and is this where you really want to go? Is it where God really wants you to go?

As areas of concern are identified, I write them down; with specifics. Exactly what or who is this problem about. Seeing it on paper helps me to realize that what I feel about a situation is not always accurate or relative to the problem. Sometimes the thing that is unhealthy is a lot smaller and simpler than my feelings would suggest. Sometimes it is a lot bigger and needs to be honestly acknowledged.

Now comes the hard part. Without a strong desire to change, even the best advice will be worthless. Without effort and commitment to improve, chances are you will still be facing the same problems in the future. Do you just want to talk about the problem? Do you just want sympathy? Or are you truly seeking a way to move forward and make the necessary changes? Some circumstances can’t be changed, but the way that you react and respond to them can. We can eliminate some of our problem areas, avert others or at least improve almost all of them.

Some changes take money. Some just take time, some take mental or physical effort. All change will take a decision by you to make it happen and an investment of some kind.

At the end of today’s post, there is a list of headings. You will probably be able to come up with several more of your own to add to it. I would encourage you over the coming week to take some time out to go through the list and give yourself a proactivity check.  Identify the areas you would like to change and write them down. If you are like me, you will have a rather long list, which can be a little demoralizing. Perhaps you might like to focus on the most pressing issues. Have a look through your list and choose 3 things to begin with.

What were your dreams and ambitions? Did you always want to paint? Write a book? Sing? Pray an instrument?

Do you have unrealised ambitions or goals? Always wanted to paint, sing, play an instrument, write a book?? Now’s the time to start.

It may be a good idea to focus on only one large, serious thing, and two smaller problems that will be quick and relatively easy to change. You can now make a plan and move forward.

So how do you move forward? You could do one or several of the following:

  • Pray through each area and ask God for wisdom and direction. (Maybe the underlying issue is that your relationship with God is not where it should be. It is possible to make changes in your own strength, but so much more effective to make them with the help of the Holy Spirit. Perhaps now is the time to get right with God.)
  • Read the bible and see what He already has to say about it.
  • Find a Godly older, more mature or more experienced woman to serve as a mentor. (God’s idea, not mine; see Titus 2)
  • Ask your husband for his ideas. I’m sure he has plenty! They might involve leopard-print, but hear him out anyway! Your husband has wisdom and insight that will help you to see issues in a different light.
  • Find the resources you need. Buy or borrow a book, listen to a talk on CD, surf the net
  • Find a friend or family member who is strong in the area of your weaknesses and ask for their help.
  • Speak to a professional if necessary. Be it counselor, Pastor, financial planner, doctor, nutritionist etc.

Try to be realistic with your goal setting. One of my daughters was very disappointed to be told that she would never realize her ambition of growing up to be a Daddy! She quickly got over it though and decided she would be a snail instead!

When I see the heading “Physical health”, I immediately think of how I would like to bake fresh sour dough bread for our family. I have tried this once and the result was a brick-like loaf that would have made a better doorstop than a sandwich. Clearly, I need more than a recipe printed out from the internet. I am planning to take a 4 hour class with an expert on sour dough and come home equipped with the knowledge I need to achieve my goal. It requires some time, some money and the commitment to go ahead and get it organised.

Perhaps the mess is driving you insane. Find a home organisation book, train your children to do chores and de-clutter!
Perhaps a mess is driving you insane. Find a home organisation book, train your children to do chores and de-clutter!

When I look at the heading “Household” my linen cupboard comes to mind. Every time I opened the doors, towels and sheets exploded out at me from the over-filled bottom two shelves, while the top 2 shelves sat almost bare of their contents. My daughter is responsible for folding and putting away these items as they come through the wash. As she is only 7 ½ she finds it difficult to reach the top shelves, which results in the contents gradually migrating downwards. The solution? Two $8 sea grass storage baskets to store some of the towels in the other bathroom, re-arranging the cupboard so that the least used items were up the top and storing sheet sets in their matching pillowcases as a compact bundle (a tip from a home organisation book that I read.) While migration does still happen, it has been slowed greatly by the new arrangements.

Who needs pants?

The heading “Children and family” brings to mind a current issue we are facing. Our 3-year-old son quite often exits the toilet naked from the waist down, regardless of who is at the front door or how many visitors we have in the house.  Modesty is something we work on as a family and as my husband and I want our children to be a blessing to others rather than a menace this is a problem we need to address and resolve – before he turns 16.

Some circumstances can't be changed, but we can choose how we react to them.Your problem areas may be far more serious than the examples I have given. Perhaps you are a single parent, divorced, facing addiction or abuse of some kind. Maybe you have lost 10 kgs and nothing in your wardrobe fits anymore. Perhaps you have gained 10 kg and nothing fits anymore. Maybe you need to get right with God. Whatever it is, it’s time to take action.

Perhaps it's time you gave your appearance an overhaul, starting with your wardrobe.

What’s wrong with my clothes??

Now you may not be a Mother, or wife, but if you are a Christian, your general priorities should be: God first, husband second, children & family third and on from there.

Do not bury your head in the sand and hope your difficulties will go away. Face the problem head on and climb that mountain. We all have an obligation to use our God given talents to the best of our ability.  Live intentionally and be proactive.

Your diet will have an impact on your outlook, energy levels and overall health. Is change needed here?
Your diet will have an impact on your outlook, energy levels and overall health. Is change needed here?

Here are some headings to get you started on your pro-activity check:

Self-improvement (grooming and appearance, wardrobe, character, self-image, skills, talents, hobbies, interests, creativity, goals, aspirations, dreams, leadership)

Mental health (depression, stress, emotional problems, phobias, compulsions, suicidal feelings)

Physical health (diet & nutrition, exercise, weight control, sickness & pain)

Spiritual health (bible study, prayer life, relationship with God, spiritual gifts, teaching, evangelism, discipleship, proverbs 31 woman, Titus 2)

Social/relational (friendships, re-connect with someone, forgive someone, conversation & communication skills)

Marriage (husband/wife relationship, love languages, sex life, date nights, communication, marriage seminars, counseling)

Children and family (character, behaviour, relationships, discipline and training, routine)

Household (menu planning, hospitality, organization, home improvements, decorating, time management)

Work & study (time management, computer, facebook, emails)

Money (budgeting, giving, debt, saving)

Issue Plan of attack – resources I need or action to take
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2.
3.

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Our “Names of Jesus” Jesse Tree

Posted on December 31, 2012 by angathome
Bible reading scrolls to go with each name of Jesus.

Bible reading scrolls to go with each name of Jesus.

If you are looking for different ideas for a Christmas Jesse tree, family devotions, family alter, bible study or daily circle time, then studying some of the many names of Jesus with your children can be a great learning experience.

You can make it as simple or elaborate as you like. We used this idea for our Christmas Jesse tree this year so I prepared everything ahead of time; including printing out the bible readings and making small scrolls with them (see photo above) and making or buying a symbol for each name of Jesus and wrapping them all individually.

Wrapped Jesse tree symbols

Wrapped Jesse tree symbols

Each morning during our family circle time, one child found the bible reading scroll of the day and wrapped symbol. As we read through the verses, everyone listened carefully and raised their hand as soon as they heard a name of Jesus. (Some readings had more than one in them.) After finishing the scroll they guessed which name we were looking at today and what the symbol could be, briefly discussed what that means to us or what it teaches us about Jesus and then opened the symbol to hang onto the Jesse tree.

The names, symbols and bible readings that we used are photographed below. A few of the readings do not have the name in them directly, but add related information and there are probably many more that could be added.

J tree 1st born

1. Firstborn of every creature (Colossians 1:15-20 1 Corinthians 3:9-15 ESV) {This is supposed to be a race ribbon for first place. A plastic trophy or medal would work well.}

Alpha and Omega

2. Alpha and Omega (Revelation 1:7-8 Revelation 1:12-18 Revelation 21:5-7 Revelation 22:12-14 ESV) {These are swizzle sticks – just an interesting way to display the A and Z as the English equivalent of alpha and omega.}

Mighty Warrior

3. Mighty God (Isaiah 9:6 Isaiah 63:1 Deuteronomy 10:17 Job 36:5 ESV) {Popsicle sticks shaped and glued to make a sword.}

Everlasting Father

4. Everlasting Father (Isaiah 9:6 Hebrews 1:8-12 ESV) {This is our earthly Father}

Prince of Peace
5. Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6 Ephesians 2:13-17 ESV) {Peace Christmas decoration.}

Unspeakable Gift
6. Unspeakable Gift (2 Corinthians 9:10-15 John 4:7-10 ESV) {Another Christmas decoration.}

Lamb of God

7. Lamb of God (John 1:29-36 Hebrews 7:27 1 Peter 1:14-19 Revelation 5:6-14 ESV) {Plastic lamb.}

Shepherd

8. Good Shepherd  (Psalm 23 Matthew 2:5-6 John 10:1-18 Revelation 7:17 ESV) {This is the corner piece from a metal coat hanger – a small tent peg would work just as well.}

Jesus is born Bethlehem star

9. Bright and Morning Star (Revelation 22:14-17 2 Peter 1:17-19 ESV) {Our usual tree topper}

Anointed One

10. The Christ/Anointed One/ Messiah (Matthew 16:13-17 Acts 4:25-28 Acts 10:37-38 ESV) {We thought this ornament looked like a jar of anointing oil.}

Holy

11. Holy One (Mark 1:21-26 Acts 3:11-16 ESV) {The music is the hymn Holy Holy Holy. I googled images for “holy holy holy” and several choices came up. I just dropped it into a word document so I could size it to fit the music note ornament.}

Light of the World

12. Light of the World (Revelation 21:22-27 John 8:12 John 12:35-36 ESV) {They give these battery operated candles out every year at carols in the park events.}

The Word
13. The Word and Wonderful Counsellor (John 1:1-5 Revelation 19:11-13 Isaiah 9:6 ESV) {This is a dolls house miniature. I had to buy this online and it was a little expensive but we all love it. It actually has the new testament printed inside and you can read it with a magnifying glass.}

Servant

14. Servant (Matthew 12:17-18 Mark 10:43-45 Acts 3:26 Philippians 2:3-11 ESV) {Small craft wooden dowels with ricrac hot glued onto one and wool on the other- a servant’s tools.}

King of Kings

15. King of Kings Lord of Lords (Isaiah 33:22 Zechariah 9:9 Zechariah 14:16 Revelation 19:11-16 ESV) {This came off a broken Princess headband.}

The Vine
16. Vine (John 15:1-11 ESV) {A regular Christmas ornament.}

Lilly

17A. Lily of the Valley (Song of Solomon 2:1 ESV) {An artificial lily flower.} We did two symbols today because there is only one small reading for the lily.

The Door

17B Door [of the sheepfold] (John 10:7-10 John 14:6-7 Psalm 118:19-21 ESV) {These craft sticks came with the small dowels I used for the scrolls. Regular popsicle sticks would do nicely.}

Friend

18. Friend (Matthew 11:16-19 James 4:4 ESV) {We talk about their siblings being their best friends regularly.}

Saviour

19. Saviour (Luke 2:8-14 John 3:16 Acts 4:12 John 4:39-42 Hebrews 7:27 ESV) {Another regular ornament.}

Ancient of Days

20. Ancient of Days (Psalm 102:25-27 Daniel 7:9-10 ESV) {An old broken watch.}

Branch/Stump/Root of Jesse

21. Branch/Flower of Jesse (Isaiah 11:1-2 Jeremiah 23:5-6 Romans 15:12-13 ESV) {A twig from the backyard.}

The Rock

22. Rock & Cornerstone (Psalm 62:5-7 Ephesians 2:18-22 ESV) {Another backyard find in a bag so we can hang it.}

Lion of Judah
23. Lion of Judah (Revelation 5:1-5 ESV) {This is actually a plastic tiger and the children keep insisting you can tell the difference!}

Faithful and True (The reading talks about Jesus returning on a white horse)

24. Faithful and True (Revelation 3:14-16 Revelation 19:11-12 ESV) {This verse talks about Jesus riding on a white horse.}

Baby

25. Baby/Son of God/Son of Man (Luke 2:8-18 ESV) {From last year – a cross-stitch of Jesus in the manger.}

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Sizzlers and grace.

Posted on August 4, 2012 by angathome

Our treasure tree after a day or two. (It is now quite well covered, but as we had cut up a LOT of leaves, it is by no means full.)

We are going out to dinner in a restaurant tonight. It is the culmination of our treasure tree character reward system. No, the tree is not full, but after reading “Give Them Grace” by Elyse Fitzpatrick we have decided to implement one of her suggestions. She mentioned marble jars and other reward systems and suggested that occasionally we should simply fill them up and have the reward as an act of grace towards our children.

We have been a very intentional recently about the message of grace and how we present the gospel to the children since reading her book. We have focussed more often on how our good works, right living and good character (being a “good” person) cannot earn our way to heaven or gain God’s forgiveness. We have discussed how we will never measure up to the perfect standard that God expects from us.

Of course, the message does not stop there. When we are finally able to admit our sin and see our need for a saviour, we can turn to Jesus and through His death on the cross, bearing the sin of us all, we can repent, receive forgiveness and be made holy in God’s sight.

We presented the children with the treasure tree chart and asked them what they were requires to do to earn their reward.  (Fill the tree with leaves by displaying acts of Godly character.) We asked if they had earned that reward – did they deserve it? As the tree is far from full, they could only say that they didn’t. By this stage, the older children were beaming as they had already guessed what was coming. We then announced that we would be taking them to Sizzlers as a demonstration of grace to remind them to think about the amazing free gift of salvation that they have available to them through Jesus, despite the fact that they haven’t earned it and don’t deserve it.

Who knows whether they will remember this in time to come, or if it will make any difference to their spiritual walk in the long run, but we will all have a wonderful family night out together and who knows what lasting impact it may have?

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Scripture memorisation

Posted on March 9, 2012 by angathome

Most Christians understand the importance of memorising scripture; of writing God’s word on our hearts so that we may be able to live by it on a day by day basis. Those occasions where a scripture just pops into our heads when we are caught up in a situation, giving us a warning or guidance that is needed in the moment, are unlikely to happen if we have nothing stored up in our memory for just such an occasion. The same applies to helping our children memorise bible verses.

There are so many ways to go about teaching our little ones how to remember bible verses, the benefit to us being that as we do it together with them we are storing up scripture in our own memories as well. We have tried a few different methods along the way, some of which I’ll outline for you below.

Our favourite system so far (and the one we are using at the moment) is scripture set to song. We start a new verse each Monday during circle time and find that by Friday even our youngest participant (4 years) has easily memorised the song and therefore the scripture passage. There are a few resources around for this but we like the Children Arise CD Series. The music is professionally produced, with children’s’ voices and catchy tunes. They also stay true to the scripture, pretty much singing straight through word for word rather than altering and manipulating the bible verses to fit the music as some other resources do.

Another system we like is the Scripture box from Simply Charlotte Mason. Scriptures are stored on index cards in a simple flip box system and read through on a daily basis until all family members are able to recite the verse. The system details how to cycle through and review verses already memorised and is simple to set up and use.

We have a large white board on the wall near our dining room table and we have written verses we are working on up here. We have redeemed those wasted moments when children tend to lose control while waiting for the meal to arrive at the table by reciting the verses we are working on.

Another great place to pin scriptures that you want children to remember is on the bathroom mirror (you can even write it on in permanent marker and remove once it is well-known) or on the back of the toilet door. When there’s nothing else to do it’s amazing how many times your eyes will travel back over whatever is in front of them.

Pin verses around and about the house anywhere that they are likely to be noticed and read. Above the washing machine to glance through when throwing a load on, above the kitchen sink to contemplate while doing the dishes, above the computer keyboard or any other place you or the children will likely have a spare mental moment to read through and commit to memory.

Reciting verses as part of family devotions can also be very rewarding. Perhaps children who have memorised their verses with Mum can have the thrill of reciting to Dad what they have learnt. I have printed up certificates with the bible verses on them for each child to place into their own keepsake box or pin up on their pinboard as a small reward for learning each one.

However you decide to do it, it’s not as hard as you think once you get going. For me, I need to get a whole bunch prepared ahead of time so that there is no day-to-day planning involved, otherwise it just didn’t happen. You may like to choose scriptures on a day by day basis that are related to character or behavioural issues you are currently dealing with. Which ever way works for you, choose one and get started!

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Jesus trees, Lent and Christian Easter activities for children

Posted on March 7, 2012 by angathome

This Easter we are continuing to build family traditions as we focus on the biblical events that are the foundations of the Easter celebration. Here are some of the new activities we are trying out for Easter this year. The ones we like will become yearly traditions, the others we’ll have fun doing just this time. We haven’t actually made any of these yet so they are untried recommendations, however they look like fun and we’ll take the punt that they are worth the time and effort.

We have already missed the start of lent and with our latest baby due any time now we will not be attempting the 40 day count down, but this Jesus tree activity we’ll save for next year. Similar to the Jesse tree that we made for Christmas, a Jesus tree uses picture or object symbols to represent the major biblical stories culminating in the death and resurrection of Jesus at Easter. My plan for this is to collect 2 large branches and fasten them together to make a natural looking cross. We will then read the bible verses that go with each symbol, colour them in and add them to the cross over the 40 days of Lent. Free printable symbols are available at this blog, with a black and white and colour version as well.

In place of the Jesus tree count down we will use our resurrection eggs to count down the 12 days before Easer. (This year our resurrection eggs contain bible readings that retell the main events of Easter plus little symbols for each part that come from this blog.) I plan to hide one each day for the children to find and read during circle time.

These Easter story pecan cookies have an amazing amount of symbolism woven through the recipe. As each ingredient is added to the biscuits, a snippet of the Easter story is read that relates to that ingredient and even the way it is mixed or prepared has symbolism. The cookies are placed into the oven tomb are hollow when the tomb is re-opened. I can’t wait to do this one.

These resurrection rolls (scroll down at the link to find them) are also very symbolic, with the Easter story attached to the method of preparing and the ingredients used. Rather than buy a prepared dough that we probably can’t get in Australia anyway, I’ll just mix up a basic sweet dough in the bread maker and use that. Even sheets of prepared pastry would work.

We will use these symbols of Jesus to decorate Easter crosses by cutting out just the pictures and make cute cracked egg Easter cards. This article with general information about Lent was helpful as I really didn’t have much of an idea what Lent was all about and we’ll make these simple palm branches for Palm Sunday.

The legend of the pretzel was another great find this year. I had no idea that there was symbolism attached to pretzels or that they were traditionally an Easter food. We will attempt the paper pretzel pattern (although I made one myself and found it easier to do it by trial and error as I had no idea whatsoever how to follow the instructions they gave!) I think the children will have much more fun making real dough pretzels and topping them with a variety of flavours.

Another paper craft was this paper plate tomb and angel and a bunch of Easter lapbook activities from a variety of sites:

More ideas are available in my last post here.

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Creating Christian Easter traditions

Posted on March 3, 2012 by angathome

So much hype surrounds Christmas and with all the decorations, gifts and preparation we naturally spend quite a bit of time deliberately focussing on Jesus and the true meaning of the Christmas celebrations. Easter however tended to be very low-key and while we always read to the children about Easter in the bible we felt that much more could be done to mark this important Christian celebration than we had been doing. After all, Easter is when Jesus dies for our sins so that we may be forgiven and enabled us through His death to be judged fit to enter heaven. Probably the most important time in the Christian calendar and yet almost unnoticed for many families, other than a couple of chocolate eggs and a hot cross bun!

The following are a couple of ideas that we have begun and will extend upon over the following years in order to focus our children on the important meaning behind this time of year.

Decorations: We decorate for Christmas, why not Easter? We have started a selection of symbols, books and Easter resources that we use to make a display leading up to the Easter period. This year we are making a living Easter centrepiece that I found here: http://mustardseeds.typepad.com/my_weblog/2010/03/tutorial-hill-of-calvary.html

Traditions:

  • We use a sand tray to re-tell the Easter story with a yoghurt pot tomb, rock to cover the entrance, pipecleaner people, popstick crosses, etc. and leave it out for the children to manipulate and play with.
  • On Easter Friday we re-tell the story again using a paper mache tomb that we made together a couple of years ago (in the picture above), wrapping a pipe cleaner “Jesus” in a bandage and sealing him into the tomb by rolling the stone over the entrance. On Easter Sunday we get up before the children, unwrap Jesus and leave the cloth laying in the tomb, roll the stone aside and place an angel figurine from our Christmas decorations on the top of the tomb. The first time we did this my then 5 year old daughter was stunned and stood gaping at the tomb saying in amazement “Jesus really HAS risen!!” We had to explain to her that there hadn’t really been any Easter pipe cleaner man miracle!
  • We do allow the children to have chocolate Ester eggs. For Christians wanting the focus to stay on Jesus at Easter, chocolate eggs can be quite controversial. We decided as the children would more than likely be given chocolate eggs anyway, we would use the egg and teach them the Christian symbolism behind it. The focus is on the egg being a sign of new life (Jesus coming alive again) and being hollow inside like the tomb after he rose. We read stories like “The Legend of The Easter Egg” by Lori Walburg which reinforce the symbolism behind the egg.

The Legend of the Easter Egg

  • We do have an Easter egg hunt on the Sunday. Instead of finding tonnes of chocolate eggs though, we use resurrection eggs. Commercial resurrection eggs are available online and in Christian stores and we do have a set of these, however we have made our own in a variety of forms over the last couple of years and used these. Resurrection eggs contain bible readings that retell the main events of Easter plus little symbols for each part. We usually finish the hunt with one chocolate egg each. This year our home-made resurrection eggs come from here: http://www.annieshomepage.com/eastereggstext.html

  • We have also had a treasure hunt on the Sunday where clues on large paper eggs led from one location to another. Each clue egg had the next part of the Easter story on it which we read together before following the clue to the next paper egg. We finished the hunt with real china egg cups with a chocolate egg inside for each child.
  • “The Lamb” by John Cross is another brilliant book to read at Easter or anytime really. It begins with creation and makes a clear identification between Jesus and the sacrificed lamb for forgiveness of sins. Each chapter starts with a review and has questions at the end to check understanding. Included with the book is a 60 minute CD, providing a word for word narration. I have seen my three year old come ahead in leaps and bounds in her understanding of the gospel, however it was more than sophisticated enough for anything up to teens to read on their own. An excellent resource for circle time, family devotions or just to read together.Only available in Australia here: http://www.goodseed.com/products/lamb-eng-book/


More ideas for Easter traditions and activities coming over the next couple of days.

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Family devotions

Posted on February 27, 2012 by angathome

In my last post I mentioned that it is the Father’s role to lead his family spiritually. In many families this role has been handed over to the church, Sunday school, Christian school or sometimes Mum. While spiritual input from all of these areas can be very beneficial, it is primarily the Father’s responsibility. One tangible way that Dad can take hold of this role is by leading his family in daily devotions (sometimes known as family alter or bible study time.)

WHAT ARE FAMILY DEVOTIONS?

  • Regular bible study with the whole family. This time can also include worship (in the form of singing), prayer, and possibly catechism and scripture memorization. Catechism and scripture memorization are both important, however some families do them separately at other times throughout the day.

WHY SHOULD WE DO IT?

  • In short – God tells us to! It is not enough to take our children to church and youth group and hope for the best. We must disciple our children, teaching them in our homes, with the Father as the primary lead in this area.
  • We become the prime spiritual influence in the lives of our children – it allows us to shepherd our children’s hearts; preparing their hearts for the gospel and salvation, building their faith and strengthening a biblical worldview.
  • Worshiping and communicating with God is vital for the whole family, not just Mum and Dad.
  • It promotes personal spiritual growth, helping us (and our family) to learn the bible, it’s doctrines and teachings in order that we know what we believe and why. If our children do not know God’s word they will be unable to honour, respect and live by it. Children need to learn that the bible tells us what to do and gives us insight for daily life; that it is relevant to them and their everyday situations. As families study together, parents can weed out errors in belief and misunderstandings
  • Worshiping and studying God’s word together builds family unity, strengthening and building healthy family relationships.

HOW DO WE DO IT?

  • The “how” of family devotions changes with each family’s unique situation, time constraints, ages of children and a myriad of other factors. Find a way that works for you and do it – regularly!
  • Decide where; Lounge chairs, around the dining table, on the end of beds, sprawled on the lounge room floor…
  • Decide when; As soon as the family is awake, immediately before or after a meal, after dinner clean-up, just before bed? Ideally choose a time when children are fed and well rested.
  • Decide how long; this depends on the age of the children. Keep it to a reasonable time limit, but not so short that you cannot give adequate attention to God’s word.

TODDLERS AND YOUNGER

  • Give thanks before meals. Hold the child’s hands and encourage them to join in with “Amen” at the end. Encourage them to echo or say simple prayers as they are able.
  • Pray with and for the child at bedtime
  • Have your own devotions in front of the child
  • Read short, colourful bible stories. Perhaps ask a simple comprehension question or two afterwards.
  • Sing simple bible based children’s songs together
YOUNG CHILDREN TO MIDDLE YEARS
  • Bible stories are still important, branching out into the lesser known ones.
  • Spice up your devotion time by acting out stories, using puppets or pictures, involving the children in role play and re-tell.
  • Introduce real-life stories, applications and real Christian “heroes”
  • Ask questions for comprehension and real-life application of what they have read; “What would you do if..?”
  • As children can read, have them take their turn to read out the verses being studies.
PRE-TEEN TO TEEN
  • Discussion, sharing and engagement become much more important.
  • It’s ok to not always have the answer – model how to find out.
  • Personal devotions for the children should be well and truly up and running – perhaps set “homework” and discuss together, work through devotional books together or research tricky questions.
  • Discuss current affairs and politics and the biblical basis for decisions making in these areas. What are the biblical rights and wrongs of what is going on?
  • Teens take time – make sure you plan for it!
MULTIPLE AGES
  • Beware of dumbing everything down for the younger children, they will pick up more than you think.
  • use a mix of resources; some days may cater more for the younger, others the middle or older.
  • Young children may stay for the first part of devotions then head off to bed while the older children delve in more deeply.
  • Involve the older children in planning and running the devotion time.
  • Everyone may do the same bible study together, with younger children having a children’s bible story at night before bed and older children working through separate studies in the evening

FORMAT

  • Sing together. Perhaps a kids bible song, contemporary worship song  and a traditional hymn. Do not neglect the great hymns of the faith; the words in these will teach spiritual truths to children and will lodge in their memories for a lifetime. Voddie Baucham’s article on family worship touches on why we should sing hymns: http://web.me.com/voddieb/vbm/Blog/Entries/2009/11/5_Answering_Your_Questions.html
  • Study the bible. There are many ways to do this. A couple are: Chapter by chapter (simply work your way through books of the bible from start to finish in small chunks), following a theme or topic or read 1 proverb, a section of a psalm and a couple of verses from the New Testament each day.
  • Several great ideas are included in an article by Al Troester here: http://www.wholesomewords.org/family/famaltar.html)
  •  Perhaps Dad could read through the selected text to begin with, then ask those children who can read to take it in turns to read 2 lines each and those who cannot yet read to echo the words of each verse after you. Dad then teaches back through the selected text – children are asked to contribute to discussions or ask questions after he has explained each line or two. Each person finishes the bible study section by telling something they have learnt or can apply to their own lives. Always look for the applications and personal lessons after each reading and teaching time.
  • Pray. All family members take a turn to pray for whatever is appropriate that day. It is helpful to have some kind of prayer journal or recording system to help with purposeful prayer and to notice the answers to prayer that God gives us. Record the date it was prayed for, what was prayed and leave a column to record God’s answer.
  • Catechism. The catechism is a series of questions and answer that children memorise to learn the main doctrines of the Christian faith, building a strong foundation for world view and ensuring they know what they believe. (More info on this another time:)
  • Scripture memorization. (More ideas on how to do this another day too :)


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Children who stand strong in their faith: Walking against the crowd

Posted on February 24, 2012 by angathome

One of the topics raised amongst our GEMS leaders a little while back was how to go about raising children who are able to stand strong in their faith even when no-one else is walking with them and they are away from the sheltering influence of their parents and family. How do we prepare them to be in the world but not of the world; to be able to choose the narrow path and walk against the flow? (Even if that means standing alone because “every one else is doing it!”)

I believe the key is that our children must develop their own genuine saving faith and not be relying on ours to carry them through. They must have the Holy Spirit as their strength and their own conviction to stand on God’s word and to follow His commandments and statutes. Our teaching as parents must be overt, deliberate, ongoing, free from hypocrisy, giving a good role model and above all, reaching the heart of our children. Our teaching will be molding the external behavior of our children, but this must transition to heart knowledge, to the child internalizing the beliefs for themselves. We can only do so much here and pray that God will do the rest. In the end, when a difficult test comes, only if our children have chosen God and His ways for themselves will they make the difficult decisions and stand alone if necessary, because otherwise they simply will not want to!

Dads should be leading their family spiritually. There are many ways to do this, including holding family devotions, leading world view discussions on current affairs, discussing what they believe and why and relating that back to the bible. Be deliberate in teaching the bible, memorizing scripture, training character, reading inspiring books with a message and praying together. Soak your children in the beliefs, understandings and world view you want them to have well before a time of testing will come. Decisions made ahead of time without the emotions and pressure of the heat of the moment, decisions that have been discussed, thought through, prayed over and become an internalized way of life will not be overturned quickly. We all can think of actions and decisions made in the heat of the moment that we wish we could change and would have done differently had we previously thought through the issues involved.

You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.

(Deuteronomy 6:7 ESV)

We need to keep the lines of communication open; talking about everything. Make time alone to share, bond and discuss those innermost thoughts and feelings. Work to surround your children with peers who are being raised with similar convictions, standards and beliefs. Two or more standing together is so much easier than one standing alone. Foster a close relationship. Fill their love tanks. A child who knows that they are unconditionally loved by their families will have an extra inner reserve of strength to stand firm. A needy, empty child will turn to those who fulfill those needs that are not being met at home.

Certain personalities will be more naturally able to take a leadership role and less likely to blindly follow the crowd. All of us need to be able to make the hard decisions though and learn not to follow when the leaders are leading in the wrong direction. Teach your children about personality types and love languages. Help them to identify their own strengths and weaknesses and areas that they will have to be particularly vigilant in. Help to identify why they feel the way they do and to be able to be objective about their decision making.

Guard your child’s ear and eye gate. Give them excellent literature to read that portrays great role models and biblical worldview; do not pollute their innocence with worldly ideas through literature, magazines or on screen. Choose television programmes very carefully or better still get rid of the T.V. completely. The more exposure to non-biblical thinking we give our children the more they will be subtly bought into the idea of the world’s norms and tend to adapt them as their own. Slow attitude change is often hardly noticeable but Hollywood has its own agenda and it shouldn’t fit with ours as Christians. If the role models they are watching and listening to are “doing it” then children are being nudged in that direction and may begin to normalize non-biblical behaviour and accept it as ok.

Shield your child by not putting them into situations that will likely test them before they are ready to handle it. Be aware of the scenarios faced at sleep-overs, parties, weekends away and the like. I had good friends who were fairly like-minded, with careful parents. It was only through the grace of God however that I came through the parties, sleepovers and get-togethers we attended relatively unscathed. I’m sure my parents would have been horrified to know what went on at some of the places we went to – even those with so-called responsible adults in attendance!

Substitute inappropriate situations with alternatives if there are such available. For example, the end of year 11 was a time to go away camping with all the highschoolers and a time of drinking, partying and a lot of other things we don’t need to list. There was no way my parents were prepared to let me go away unchaperoned and luckily for me many of my friends’ parents felt the same way. My Mother volunteered to take us all camping and attended as the supervising adult (much to my embarrassment at the time.) She did turn out to be remarkably “cool” and as it was this or nothing everyone came and we had a great time together.

There are no easy answers and no quick fixes. Equipping our children to stand strong on their convictions is a process and we build on to that equipping every day for years.

  [9] And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.

(Galatians 6:9 ESV)

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Our Jesse tree symbols and readings for Advent

Posted on November 25, 2011 by angathome

Day 1: God's creation. (This decoration reminded us of the planets around the sun)

As we seek to focus our family on the true meaning of Christmas, we have been taking deliberate steps to create yearly Christmas traditions and memories. I have finally finished all the symbols and readings for our Jesse tree for Advent this year. The children have been involved in searching for and choosing the symbols for each day (some alternative ideas here.) Most were found in discount variety stores, some were gathered from around the house and we even made a couple. I spray-painted them all gold to keep a constant theme (and just to look nice!) and it was amazing how good even the cheap plastic animals look with a coat of gold. The readings we chose came from some of the many online choices available (links at the bottom of this post about Jesse trees.)

Bible reading scrolls

I have typed up the bible readings, printed them out onto thin card and hot glue gunned on thin craft sticks to make scrolls. Each one has a small circle of ribbon to hold it closed that can be slipped off to read the scroll. Each night the children will take it in turns to open the scroll and unwrap each symbol after the reading. (I thought wrapping the symbols would make it even more exciting and they could guess what symbol would represent the readings we had heard before seeing what it was.)

Day 2 Adam and Eve (The forbidden fruit)

Day 3 Noah's ark (birds sent out 3 times to find dry land) There are lots of bird decorations out this year so these were easy to find.

Day 4 Abram (descendants as many as the stars)

Day 5 Isaac (ram as sacrifice) This is just a plastic ram sprayed gold but it looks great!

Day 6 Jacob's ladder (This ladder came from a bird cage set.)

Day 7 Joseph (Sold for 30 pieces of silver into slavery)

Day 8 Moses (in basket) This miniature frame had what looked like reeds around the edge.

Day 9 The 10 commandments (Not quite a stone tablet but as close as we could get.)

Day 10 Joshua (The battle of Jericho) This was a cheap plastic tower with a plastic knight to build inside. We used the knight's shield and sword for Gideon so 2 for the price of one!

Day 11 Gideon (A sword for the Lord and for Gideon)

Day 12 Samuel (His Mother takes him a little coat each year) My least favourite decoration - fabric does not spray-paint well.

Day 13 David (5 stones for Goliath)

Day 14 Elijah (fed by the ravens)

Day 15 Hezekiah (empty enemy tent)

Day 16 Isaiah (Tongs and hot coal)

Day 17 Jeremiah (Known as the weeping prophet) Made of salt dough.

Day 18 Habakkuk (His watchtower) Already dropped and broken and we haven't even got it on the tree yet!! More salt dough.

Day 19 Nehemiah (Rebuilding the city wall) A previously useless gate from a plastic doll's house - perfect for this.

Day 20 John (baptizing in the river) Think laterally!

Day 21 Mary & Elizabeth (Messenger angel) It's impossible to find male angels!

Day 22 Zechariah (Tablet and stylus) The modern day version.

Day 23 Joseph (Loves and marries Mary) The rings are wedding favours that come in bags of 50.

Day 24 Magi (3 Wise Men's gifts to Jesus)

Day 25 Jesus' birth (Star of Bethlehem) There are 2 readings and 2 symbols today - the second symbol is tree lights which are turned on to represent the light of Jesus now shining in the world.

Filed under: Celebrations, events & festivals (Christmas, birthdays etc.), Christian Education, character, Sundays and the Sabbath | Tagged: , , , , , , , | 4 Comments »

The Sorting Out Prayer (Sibling conflict)

Posted on November 15, 2011 by angathome

Product: Parents Arise Image

After using the “Children Arise” CD’s with my children for circle time I was interested in reading the story of how they came about in “Parents Arise” by Janine Target. I thoroughly enjoyed the book and recommend having a look. (Here at Koorong or here at Growing Families) With the author’s permission, I am reproducing below just one of the ideas she presented in her book and I think it was worth purchasing it for this alone.

We have always had our children apologise (say “sorry”) for mistakes and accidents and ask for forgiveness for deliberate sins (acts of unkindness etc.) They are required to reconcile by making eye contact, naming the specific sin, asking for forgiveness (I’m sorry I spoke unkindly to you, will you forgive me?) and then hugging the offended person. (There is just something about physical contact that melts hearts and helps siblings to reconcile. Older children, especially boys, are required to shake hands.)

Once they have worked through this process, they spend some time praying about it and asking for God’s forgiveness and help for future events. Janine’s sorting out prayer takes this part of the process a couple of vital steps further and I will be introducing it as part of our family pattern for making things right with God and between family members from now on.

Here it is as it appears on page 102 of her book:

The Sorting Out Prayer

1. I forgive ……….. for…………

(Matthew 6:14,15)

2. Dear God please forgive ……….. for ………….

(Luke 23:34)

3. Please forgive me for getting angry.

(1 John 1:9)

4. Please take all the anger and upset out of me.

(1 John 1:9)

5. Please bless ………

(Luke 6:27, 28)

In Janine’s words; “It keeps us free from resentment, kept our forgiveness up to date, and it helped create an environment for strong and healthy emotional growth in each of our children.”

Filed under: Christian Education, character, Sundays and the Sabbath, Reviews & curriculum | Tagged: , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment »

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